SHUT UP!!!!
Damn it, you NEVER let me have ANY fun!!!!
~Regards, Me
Monday, October 20, 2008
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
Dear Life,
He has a girlfriend now? Damn it! Why must you vex me so!!!!
OK, OK - I'm being unfair. I know this isn't your fault, and PLUS I'm not really THAT angry at you. In recent years, your jabs and stabs have made me much too hard, and practical so I didn't honestly have any real hopes of something happening between me and him.
Still - I feel a perfectly good flirting situation slipping away from me all because you had to introduce some chick to him! Now I feel somewhat guilty every time I want to flirt with him!
I won't say 'you owe me' for this, as that is somewhat presumptuous. You are not, and have never been one for being fair. Nor are you kind to those who expect such things from you. All I'm saying is that it would be NICE, given the circumstances, for you to send me someone fabulously interesting who is interested in me. You know the kind I like. Handsome, funny, intelligent, open minded, and PASSIONATE!!
What do you say?
OK, OK - I'm being unfair. I know this isn't your fault, and PLUS I'm not really THAT angry at you. In recent years, your jabs and stabs have made me much too hard, and practical so I didn't honestly have any real hopes of something happening between me and him.
Still - I feel a perfectly good flirting situation slipping away from me all because you had to introduce some chick to him! Now I feel somewhat guilty every time I want to flirt with him!
I won't say 'you owe me' for this, as that is somewhat presumptuous. You are not, and have never been one for being fair. Nor are you kind to those who expect such things from you. All I'm saying is that it would be NICE, given the circumstances, for you to send me someone fabulously interesting who is interested in me. You know the kind I like. Handsome, funny, intelligent, open minded, and PASSIONATE!!
What do you say?
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Dear One Nighter,
What would you think if you opened up your email and found a message from me that read:
"Dear ______, I was wondering if you were doing anything tonight? If not, I was thinking maybe it would be cool if I came over to your place and fucked your brains out. TTYL"
The problem is, I don't know if a message like that is sexy, or skanky...or sexy because it's skanky. OR maybe it's neither. I remember a time when if I had heard of a girl sending a guy a message like that, I would have thought it somewhat pathetic, or desperate.
However, I am neither.
I prefer to think of myself as simply being 'Direct'.
What can I say? I want more then one night.
;)
"Dear ______, I was wondering if you were doing anything tonight? If not, I was thinking maybe it would be cool if I came over to your place and fucked your brains out. TTYL"
The problem is, I don't know if a message like that is sexy, or skanky...or sexy because it's skanky. OR maybe it's neither. I remember a time when if I had heard of a girl sending a guy a message like that, I would have thought it somewhat pathetic, or desperate.
However, I am neither.
I prefer to think of myself as simply being 'Direct'.
What can I say? I want more then one night.
;)
Saturday, October 4, 2008
To The One That Got Away
I have a confession to make to you, my dear.
I am jealous. Yes, I am. I am jealous of your new life, and all the female attention you seem to be garnering as of late. I’m ashamed of this, of course, especially considering I have no claim to your heart and being as we’ve already had that ‘relationship’ conversation where we both agreed to be friends; envy seems utterly childish of me! As I am free to have my own fun, you should be free to have yours. I do believe this, I DO. I want you to be happy and to explore other women and find someone who will love you the way you deserve to be loved…But, I am still at odds with myself, fighting with my logic and my desire for you.
Perhaps these feelings are fueled by the fact that you are someone I could love - Someone that I do love, though I try my best to keep that love from growing into something more then platonic. You made me feel safe, and cared for in a time of emotional upheaval. No small feat considering my history; speaking of which, you weren’t intimidated or repelled by said history either and that meant the world to me. I loved how our movie choices, music, thoughts, dreams, and beliefs fit together – Hell, even our neurosis’s complimented each other. Our time together, though brief, was beautiful to me, and I cherish the memories.
The thing is there were times in recent months where if you asked me to be your girlfriend, I would have said yes in a heartbeat. Now, I know you would think this sounds foolish - You would likely think it more foolish if you knew how I’ve been shamelessly flirting about town, and online with various boys. Still, I know these boys are nothing more then things for me to play with till I leave. They occupy my time, and make things interesting, but I don’t find myself thinking of them as I do you.
I suppose this letter is ultimately an apology to you; an apology for being completely selfish. I resent my gut reaction to the idea of you dating another woman is disappointment and envy - Especially since you’ve been NOTHING if not understanding and encouraging of me pursuing other men. If you want me to find love with someone, there is no reason why I shouldn’t want the same for you. I’m sure once I get used to the idea of you wanting other women, those feelings will pass and I will be left with nothing but well wishes for you.
Until then, please know I am sorry for my jealousy.
Also know that I love you dearly, and want nothing more then for you to be happy.
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